No promises.
But I am giving it all I have.
Trust me too.
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
Mom, I dont want too go.
Dear me,
I thought my life sucked. I thought NS will change everything.
I was right. I havnt had a life before I go in.
I have one now. Just 1 week before I go.
WHY!!! I really want to spend more time here. With you.
~ Next thurs. Will all be fine by then?
I thought my life sucked. I thought NS will change everything.
I was right. I havnt had a life before I go in.
I have one now. Just 1 week before I go.
WHY!!! I really want to spend more time here. With you.
~ Next thurs. Will all be fine by then?
Monday, May 22, 2006
16 days more.
My dear friend.
In the end, I came here, to chat with you. It has been a long time since I saw you. I come before you know because I have much to say, much to complain about, and much to share.
I feel really down.
I feel really tired.
I feel really alone.
First of all, I have problems with my club. It was mine to begin with, cos it was me/us who chose the current committee. I dont know where it went wrong, how it came to this state, but its disasterous. There isnt any teamwork, there isnt anyone leading, it isnt going anywhere.
I am going back almost everyday, spending more time each day to settle and help the club. Someone once told me I sold my soul to the club. I didnt. I lost it. And now everyday is like fighting a losing battle. I revisit the strategy on the paper everyday with my fellow alumnis. Everyday we rant and complain. Its like a mini series. Dramatic, twist and turns everywhere.
Its the biggest challenge in my life right now. But I'm drained. Really.
And because of the club, WE are forced to outsource. And this has led to many small skrimishes. Many of which where built on false trust and friendship. Yet I wish some turn out to be true and fruitful.
I am bad with people. I make people angry. I make people sad. I make people unhappy for all kinds of reasons. And today, I have made 2 more. I am truly sad and sorry. Nothing can express how I am feeling right now.
This sudden influx of PR have taken its toll on me. I wan a long vacation. Away from all these. I dont even know why am I here.
I feel lonely.
I would like someone to talk to, all of these. But sadly, I can turn to none. Is this desperation? I'm looking for a partner. Just a friend. Now I know its hard to find a friend you can trust.
For once, the al mightly chongyew, always so confident of himself, who alway thinks he comes before all, stands above all, is taking a backward stance. I am standing among everyone else.
I feel as thou my wings are clipped.
Trapped between the barb wires.
Stripped bare by the howling winds.
Now I feel the full magnitude of stuff, stuff from the humane world.
And too, I understand the phrase "dont make the girl fall for you if you aint going catch her".
The worst thing to do is to bring one's spirit up 100 times and turn on gravity.
Its like a double whammy. A chain car accident. A surgery and have infection set in. To kiss and slap the person again.
Tell me, have I sinned so much in my 19yrs here. This is a test/battle/race that I cannot complete alone.
I looked out the grailes.
There isnt any stars.
Even the moon was hiding.
Where are you my old friends.
Have you abandoned me for good.
To be thrown into an abyss.
Alone.
Goodnight, my evil twin.
In the end, I came here, to chat with you. It has been a long time since I saw you. I come before you know because I have much to say, much to complain about, and much to share.
I feel really down.
I feel really tired.
I feel really alone.
First of all, I have problems with my club. It was mine to begin with, cos it was me/us who chose the current committee. I dont know where it went wrong, how it came to this state, but its disasterous. There isnt any teamwork, there isnt anyone leading, it isnt going anywhere.
I am going back almost everyday, spending more time each day to settle and help the club. Someone once told me I sold my soul to the club. I didnt. I lost it. And now everyday is like fighting a losing battle. I revisit the strategy on the paper everyday with my fellow alumnis. Everyday we rant and complain. Its like a mini series. Dramatic, twist and turns everywhere.
Its the biggest challenge in my life right now. But I'm drained. Really.
And because of the club, WE are forced to outsource. And this has led to many small skrimishes. Many of which where built on false trust and friendship. Yet I wish some turn out to be true and fruitful.
I am bad with people. I make people angry. I make people sad. I make people unhappy for all kinds of reasons. And today, I have made 2 more. I am truly sad and sorry. Nothing can express how I am feeling right now.
This sudden influx of PR have taken its toll on me. I wan a long vacation. Away from all these. I dont even know why am I here.
I feel lonely.
I would like someone to talk to, all of these. But sadly, I can turn to none. Is this desperation? I'm looking for a partner. Just a friend. Now I know its hard to find a friend you can trust.
For once, the al mightly chongyew, always so confident of himself, who alway thinks he comes before all, stands above all, is taking a backward stance. I am standing among everyone else.
I feel as thou my wings are clipped.
Trapped between the barb wires.
Stripped bare by the howling winds.
Now I feel the full magnitude of stuff, stuff from the humane world.
And too, I understand the phrase "dont make the girl fall for you if you aint going catch her".
The worst thing to do is to bring one's spirit up 100 times and turn on gravity.
Its like a double whammy. A chain car accident. A surgery and have infection set in. To kiss and slap the person again.
Tell me, have I sinned so much in my 19yrs here. This is a test/battle/race that I cannot complete alone.
I looked out the grailes.
There isnt any stars.
Even the moon was hiding.
Where are you my old friends.
Have you abandoned me for good.
To be thrown into an abyss.
Alone.
Goodnight, my evil twin.
Sunday, May 07, 2006
Friday, May 05, 2006
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