Aww

It has been long. So busy this short break. None gd rest so far. Everyday is spent in sch.

I feel so mentally drained. So weak. And there is so much things to do!

1. Poly forum
2. Mile program?
3. Sri lanka Experdition
4. Medical.

All happening in a short space of a month of hols! Omggg.

My dream was to become an astronaunt. But thats not possible, the next best thing was to be a pilot. Thats not so possible too, the next best thing is an officer. If I had the chance, would I sign on as an officer? My friend said, his not going to forsake a profession in photography. Should I as well?

It has been sometime since my previous post. Was I alittle too oversensitive. But what has done has been done. Nope I'm not going to the extreme end. Am too tired. All these games...are unnessecary. Or was I playing with myself, playing with fire? I dont even know what I am talking. Fuck it.


Another friend was quick to point out something. We where on a photoshot. Had one idea, he said it was cheena, I scraped. He had an idea, it was cheena, he didnt scrap! He said,

Because your ego too big, thats why you cant try it out!

Sia lah, i'm fucked upside down. Very true indeed. Changed with immediate effect. Thanks pal.
Its this kind of comment that can fucking change one's life. And suddenly, I planned to do a series on my friends. What?! Dont fuck me. I'll fuck you back with interest.

I think I have changed. Back in those years, I envy those couples. Now, I hate them. Shldnt use the word hate. I resent. I cant help but think, the ugly side when they quarrel, when they argue, when its time for the ultimate breaking up.

What have I becomed! I have transcended from a level where I hate "Anti-racism band" (Only those who know the 2 types of ppl I hate will understand) as much as I resent couples on the road. Hate level is now...jet black.

I have a friend who broke up after 2 serious years of relationship. Why? The girl was too practical. HE just wasnt rich enough.

I have a friend going after a girl who is attached. HE mentioned about turning back time, where he would have done smt. I would have guessed he would have made the move.

Is relationship so fucking important? So fucking essential? WHY?

I told myself. Get myself a 1D MKII. Travel the world. Search for enlightenment through my lens. I Will make it happen. Someone said,

if u look down on ur dream, then it is not a dream
and if u think ur dream is nv fulfilled, den why dream? its not a dream
always live up ur dream

Erm, why did I paste this? Nvm fuck it. I'm off.

Hate Index is now : 450 pts .